Blog Archives

Chris, I think I’d recommend the helmet option…

Sometimes, when I’m feeling a little low I play ‘clocks’, ‘the scientist’ and ‘yellow’ all at the same time, on constant repeat and with increasing volume until I feel that I am actually Chris Martin. It’s such an amazing feeling to consciously uncouple from yourself and hitch your trailer to Mr Martin’s consciousness. Truly mind blowing. Only joking. I can’t imagine what kind of tat you’d find floating around inside his bonce. You’d be experiencing some serious cognitive dissonance that’s for sure.

Anyway it’s been a good long while since we’ve done any celebrity quotes and I just couldn’t resist  doing a new one when I saw this quote from Coldplay’s sassy frontman. I think I’d safely recommend the helmet option for him. Probably safer that way. Now I’ve just got to think of somewhere fitting that I can deposit it on the street. Drop us a line if you’ve got a good idea…

Cheers

id-iom

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A dark cloud descends

The Dark Cloud Descends

The Dark Cloud Descends

It’s coming to the end of the brief UK summer but we’ll hopefully still have a few days of sunshine left. Sadly, this cannot be said for this chap as a dark cloud has descended on his life and there’s nowt he can do about it. Why i hear you ask? Well he’s just found out that his ex (who recently left him due to his infidelities) has just won the Euromillions with the same weekly numbers they used to buy every week. She’s changed her mobile, moved in with some friends he’s never seen or heard of and is not replying to any of his increasingly desperate messages or emails. He’d try sending a carrier pigeon if he knew where to send it. To add insult to injury he’s just found out that she has been seen out on the town with one of her old flames. Now that’s enough to get anyone down in the dumps. I tried to tell him that everything happens for a reason and that it’ll be okay in the end but he wasn’t having any of it and just glared at me and stormed out. You can’t say I didn’t try…

Cheers

id-iom

Title: A dark cloud descends
Materials: Paint pen, acrylic, glitter and charcoal
Size: A3

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Semi Skimmed Bantha Milk

With the modest success of a few of our supermarket subversions recently my brain seems to have jumped onto the whole fake ad/culture jamming bandwagon and now it seems I can’t go to the shop without coming up with some new form of contrived nonsense. And today’s offering is a pretty good case in point.

A long time ago in a galaxy far away I was strutting the aisles of my local supermarket trying to locate something they undoubtedly didn’t have when my eye chances upon the full fat milk with the blue lid. And that was all I needed to connect blue and milk and come up with the blue milk from Star Wars called bantha milk. We even see Luke Skywalker pour himself a glass in Star Wars whilst he’s living with his aunt and uncle at their moisture farm in Tatooine.

That was all I needed in the way of a plan so went home and set to work. A couple of parsecs later and I had my label good to go – complete with interview with their sand person dairy farmer on Tatooine. All that was then required was a bottle of milk, some blue food dye and a fake price label and I was good to go.

I can already see the print and TV advertising that would go alongside this new miracle food with a tag line along the lines of “With a few glasses of semi-skimmed bantha in you a day you’ll be strong enough to pull the ears off a gundark in no time.” In fact, that’s given me an idea…

Cheers

id-iom

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Take it from the champs…

After watching Style Wars a while back I decided I wanted in on some of that funky fresh wild style 80’s action so cut myself a ‘Take it from the champs, graffiti is for chumps’ stencil based on the New York subway’s anti-graffiti campaign that ran in the 1980’s with the same tagline (which features in the film). This cheeky little number has graced a few walls already but I just liked the way it fitted on this piece of street furniture with it’s tongue-in-cheek message. How long it will last though i’m not so sure…

Cheers

id-iom

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Living in a world where everybody hears but nobody’s listening

Living in a world where everybody hears but nobody’s listening – on tube

One of the contradictions of living in today’s frenetically paced, socially connected world is that there are so many effective means to make yourself heard and so many millions of potential people to hear it that it’s hard to believe your profound statements regarding your dinner or the customer service department of whatever business you’re dealing with won’t be the talk of the nation. But they won’t. Unless you’re a celebrity however, then the opposite holds true and any crumb of information, no matter how trivial, is devoured like manna from heaven and shared around other eager acolytes. But you’re never going to reach those heady heights.

Instead, you will be resolutely ignored. Which is why I thought the humble house cat was a good graphical representation of this. It can surely hear you (unless it’s deaf) but will pay scant attention unless there’s an offer of food on the table. Quite what i’m trying to say here is not entirely clear, even to me, but I’ll leave it all in your capable hands to decipher…

As an aside we really took this one next level as we didn’t even put it on the tube ourselves. This was deposited by one of our street team. You know you’ve made it when you don’t even have to do it yourself. Cheers Leander!

Cheers

id-iom

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Self service child minder unit

Bemoaning the lack of affordable local child care seems to be something of a popular pastime for many of the young mums I know so I’m glad to see that the local council has decided to do something about it. They’ve had a multi-departmental brainstorming session and the self service child minder units are their experimental outcome. Simply deposit your child in one of the marked units and then retrieve them after work. It’s as simple as that. And it’s free. Although it should be noted that overnight stays are prohibited. I, for one, applaud this brave new move in domestic frugality…

Cheers

id-iom

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King of the Corvidae

“It was not a job he wanted but, somehow, it was a job he’d got. He was standing on a small pile of rocks with a light morning breeze ruffling his feathers and gazing out over the sea of carnage in front of him. A magpie standing nearby was nervously recounting the events of the previous evening. His words came in staccato gasps ‘The seagulls came in the dead of night and attacked en masse. Everyone was exhausted from the feast of McDonalds. A couple of rooks managed to raise the alarm but it was already too late…’. The words washed over him while he slowly came to the realisation that he was now in charge. Tears could wait. It was time to show these gulls who ruled the airspace around here once and for all.”

If I had to write a story based on this picture I’m pretty sure that’s how it would start. An epic tale of urban avian skullduggery with more aerial combat, vicious peckings and egg smashings than any story has a right to contain. All conducted right above our heads on the busy London streets. I think maybe I just got up too early this morning…

Cheers

id-iom

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Soylent Green – in store now!

Soylent Green – in store now!

Soylent Green – available now!

After being dispatched to our local corner shop to procure some Le Puy lentils for that evening’s curry I had reason to examine the dizzying array of canned food on offer in our local corner shop. Along with all the usual products they also have some particular goods that cater to the local Caribbean, Polish and Portuguese communities. It’s sometimes tricky to tell what some of the more exotic looking cans even contain. And that gave me an idea.

The 1973 film ‘Soylent Green’ starring Charlton Heston is set in a dystopian future where the earth is hugely overpopulated and there just isn’t enough food to go round. To try and solve this problem the Soylent corporation comes up with a new foodstuff called ‘Soylent Green’ which is ostensibly made from high energy plankton harvested from the world’s oceans. But that is not so, as we discover through Heston’s diligent detective work following a murder. He stumbles upon a bizarre state secret – that Soylent Green is made of people!

So, to celebrate both the incomprehensible range of cans on offer in our local shop and the 1973 film I came up with some Soylent Green cans for our local shop – complete with ingredients, nutrition information and cooking instructions. An internet search revealed that Polynesian cannibals used to call human flesh ‘longpig’ so I definitely had to include that (23% of the contents don’t you know!)

Cheers

id-iom

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DJ from outer space

For no better reason than we had the door in the garden and the devil makes work for idle hands we decided to paint up a disco door featuring our muse for this piece, Tommy. The original image was a low res pic taken on a phone and I used it for a small digital piece that I did for Tommy just because I liked the photo so much. And here it is.

DJ from outer space (original image)

He’s known to enjoy a little bit of djing occasionally and can often be found pulling this power move at about 2am if things are going his way. Clearly the masterstroke with this one is that we managed to blag him to recreate his original pose for the photo. But which is which? As our version is almost photorealistic I would imagine it’s pretty tricky to tell the difference. I’ll leave it up to you to decide…

Cheers

id-iom

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id-iom @ Whitecross Street Party 2014

LED eyes close up

brooch close up

We arrived at WXSP on Sunday at about 12.45 which given the state both of us were in was quite a feat. We’d been djing at a friend’s wedding the previous evening and were a little the worse for wear. It was also hot and we had zero ideas in the way of a plan for the day. But sometimes we work better that way.

After agreeing between us that there was to be no conscious plan we attacked the boards with all the gusto we could muster. A couple of afternoon beers helped the whole process along and before you know it we’d just about managed to knock the whole thing into some kind of shape. As we were thinking about calling it a day Artista showed up just in time for us to give her a pen or two and ask her kindly to draw a piece of toast on it. With the addition of some LED eye’s we were pretty much all done just as they started to clean up and then dismantle the boards. Ah well, they were never going to last forever. Until next time…

Cheers

id-iom

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